Inextricably Intertwined

I'm wallowing in murderous hypocrisy

for the time being but come morning,

I'm sure I'll be pretending that dying is not a riot

and ask that you take whatever

you have to take to captivate me:

Diamond ring in a China shop,

bird's eye view from a table top.

Have you always been so strong?

Tell me what you know

about how nightmares choose

which doors to let themselves in through

because I always seem to need you

when you've become quiet and I think

it's time for me to get used to

the way you look in the dark.

Even though I felt the Psalms

dripping from my palms

before I knew where they came from,

I've never been more scared of your love.

Yet I'd walk 49 united states for one day of it.

I want to hurry home and let the ghosts sleep

but if I don't have what it takes to wake them up again

and shoo them from my dwelling place, I'll ask you

if you wouldn't mind doing it.

I'm sorry that my words don't do you justice

and I'm sorry that I continue to throw myself

over the thresh holds of other peoples' melodies.

You're a story with no beginning

and an incandescently pleasurable non ending.

Your eyes see minds that have changed.

Your eyes see minds that have stayed the same!

From the bottom of the deepest chambers of my rocky heart,

thank you for not being a gray area.

But even more, thank you

for having allowed me to believe

that you are.

I wish I were good at you.

I wish I could stop forgetting how you so gracefully

cast away fear and plant seeds and cycle us through ourselves,

and each other,

and you.

I'd rather be surrounded by your biggest mistakes

than my greatest accomplishments.

When I thought about thinking about you,

I talked to myself

but it just wasn't the same.

Always please:

find me, chase me, bring me home.

I feel you everywhere.

There is so much something in my heart.

Mountains of it. But I can't tell

the joy from the sorrow.

So I will choose joy.

I will choose you.

I'm yours.