Die dunkelste Nacht

There are too many secrets
surging through me

and they're not all mine.

There's not enough room for them

and they know that.

It's too cold

(but they don't think so)

and I feed them well.

And I watch them devour 

the death that despises me.

There are too many of them hovering 

over me when I sleep.

And the voices sound like mine.

But the terrors from Hell aren't mine.

And my screams don't even curdle their blood,

they entertain them.

Sometimes I am obscene, and it's

all just entertainment.

But when I attack them in the name of God

I'd like back all the things

I don't deserve, please.

And they whisper lies to me at night.

And they ridicule me at night.

And I need to stay awake.

Oh, Dear Jesus may the

scales of lies be shed from my eyes

that believed them.

The slick and sly and skilled disguise

will not be soon forgotten.

Fight, fight fight fight.

Fight fight fight fight fight. Fight.

Fight fight. Bleed. Fight bleed.

No sleep.

It's won.

And isn't this all so convenient

to have another thing to blame but myself.

"Sounds like a personal problem."

You're right.

Good night, darkest night.

Hoppe hoppe Reiter
wenn er fällt, dann schreit er,
fällt er in den Teich,
find't ihn keinter gleich. 


Hoppe hoppe Reiter
wenn er fällt, dann schreit er,
fällt er in den Graben,
fressen ihn die Raben.


Hoppe hoppe Reiter
wenn er fällt, dann schreit er,
fällt er in den Sumpf,
dann macht der Reiter... Plumps!

love note to God.

Tell me why it is that I
Will leave you be for days
And just refuse your perfect love
In caravans of ways

Some days it is intentional
Because I am ashamed
And other times it's lack of strength
To list the wrongs I've framed

I guess there's just a part of me
That cannot comprehend
How I will stumble miserably
But you still call me friend

My heart goes beating just the same
At the times I do not I call
But why is it that I dismiss
You make it beat at all?

I wish to know you so much more
Though I've known you for so long
I want to cling to every note
Of your immaculate love song

I ask for you to take away
The things I need to lose
And I thank you for the wisdom
To know what I should choose

Losses bring some chaos
With utmost certainty
But the chains are never strong enough
That you can't set me free

My mind is much too simple
To fully realize
The peace that overwhelms my soul
Because you hear my cries

When lying bleeding on the ground
I beg for you to come
And when you're here to rescue me
It's myself you save me from.